I am the worlds worst when it comes to having a positive outlook on using my mobility aids.
It’s been a definite love/hate relationship for me. Even 12 years into my illness I still have that battle.
One of the main things for me personally is the fact my illness is completely invisible to anyone. There’s no plaster casts on my ‘broken joints’. There’s no bruising or swelling visible. I don’t walk with a limp or have a missing limb.
So, to anyone that meets me I look like anyone else. Until they clock that I use a walking stick.
So when I meet people, quite often for the first time, I will be greeted with the usual comment ‘ Oh what have you done?’. Meaning I must have hurt my leg in some spectacular fashion and that I’m now going to tell you the full hilarious story!
I hereby welcome my newest family addition. This has been a long time coming as I had put it off for such a long time! Now however, the time is right. But I want to tell you it truly is a love/ hate relationship. Can we love something and hate it at the same time?? Well I think I do. I love what it enables me to do but hate it as it draws people that I do not know to stare look and therefore makes me uncomfortable.
So here’s my new addition……………………………what do you think?
My ankle pain has been so bad since before Christmas that I have ‘given in’ and bought a walking stick to help. I have to travel to London regularly with my youngest and his acting activities that it has become a necessity!! I refuse to use it all the time however, if I know I am going to be out for an extended period I will take it with me.
So I love it because it truly helps me when I am out walking but hate it at the same time as I see people look at the stick and look at me!!! What is it?? Never seen someone with a f**king walking stick before?? It does not mean I am mentally retarded or ‘care in the community’……………………………….it just means I need help to be on my feet for longer!!!
I feel as though I need a sign around my neck saying ‘I am normal you know- no need to treat me any differently’.
My health borough refuses to pay for any M.E treatment so I don’t have access to therapy groups, or OT’s or programmes to help me manage the condition better. I have to use what works for me- and this helps for those days I know I will be having to walk longer distances. I am always in pain especially in my ankles however I refuse to confine myself to bed or stay indoors and so this is seen as a solution to problem that I have to face.
Do you know of anyone who needs walking aids or help to get around who is frustrated with how they are viewed?